Power tip: "How to rebuild trust after you get it wrong", Jen Hamilton
"Not necessarily agree, but validate."
Transcript
Ryan Castle: You're listening to Level 10 Leaders Power Tips, and I'm your host, Ryan Castle. Today we're revisiting a standout moment from our full episode with Jen Hamilton of Hamilton COOs. Her tip is on winning back trust after you get it wrong. Let's dive in.
Jen Hamilton: When we mess up, whether it was intentional or not, we've shaken someone's trust in some way. So how you get back to it is essentially what you would want yourself. What would you want if you felt wronged in some way?
It's not about making excuses. It's about letting me vent. Can I just get it all out there? Let me share with you what it all is, and you actually listen and hear it. Validate. Not necessarily agree, but validate. I can see where that came from. I can understand that concern. Just really listen. Take that act of listening.
And then what you want to be able to do is own it. I see where I did wrong. I can see how what I said here would be taken that way. It wasn't my intention. Here is my intention. So that is all good. Certainly apologize, especially where you are at fault. But don't just say, oh, I'm sorry. Really have them understand that you get how you wronged them, and what your actions or whatever it was that had them feel that way.
The biggest piece, though, is to make a promise for something new, so they can hear that you've learned from this experience and you're going to take action differently next time.
Just don't stop there. What you want to do then is be very intentional about having a way of showing them: I listened, and I honored my promise, and I'm doing it. You have to kind of bring attention to it, because right now you're [unclear in audio], and they may not even pay attention. You're doing what you said, and you think they're paying attention because you're so hyper focused on it, but you do actually want to call it out.
Say, hey, you know what, when we talked before, this didn't work. I'm trying. Is this the right thing? Am I heading in the right direction? And then they'll be like, oh, I didn't even realize. Yeah, actually, that's better. So just calling it out. Not from a hey, look what I did, but from a is this actually the way we should work forward on these kinds of things?
Ryan Castle: Thanks, Jen. To connect with Jen, go to level10.us/44. While you're there, be sure to check out more Power Tips. And thanks for listening.
Small, deliberate actions drive lasting progress. Let's get to work.
Follow the Level 10 Leaders Podcast on:
